How To Dress For A Music Festival

There are a whole load of awful things you could experience at a music festival, but - for other people - your eyebrow-raising outfit choices shouldn't be one of them. Before you set off for Glastonbury, Primavera or any of the brilliant outdoor music spectaculars happening across the globe this summer, put down the fluoro mankini and take note of the items your should avoid wearing at a music festival (plus the pieces you should pack instead). Keep cool, look cool with our guide to what to wear to a music festival.

DON'T: wear low cut T-shirts

Even if you've got a chest to rival Hugh Jackman, there's no way of getting around the fact you'll just look like you're in some terrible early Naughties boyband (or considering purchasing a jumbo bottle of vodka at an overpriced club in Piccadilly Circus).

DO: wear a 'brand merch' T-shirt

It's not just musicians who have upped their merch game over the past year (see: Justin Bieber's Purpose tour or Kanye West's Yeezy line), but more brands than ever before have launched bold new logo T-shirts. Instead of going for one of those ubiquitous Rolling Stones or Smiths shirts, proclaim your brand fandom with something graphic from Gucci, Palace, Supreme or Tommy Hilfiger.

DON'T: wear wooden beads

Because you're in a field with 50,000 other urban media types in their late twenties, not cresting some gnarly waves on your gap year.

DO: wear something subtle and silver

Instead, make like Ryan Gosling (every man's go-to summer style icon) and choose a necklace that's sleek, slim, silver and has something subtly eye-catching hanging from it. They're trending hard right now so whether you've got a budget that stretches to precious metal or something more humble and plated, there's a necklace for you out there-

DON'T: wear Kanye West shutter shades

DO: invest in a great pair of sunglasses

You'll wear them all year round, so why not use a summer festival as your excuse to upgrade your shades? Our tip: go for something lightweight with a metal frame - not only will these be more comfortable if you;re wearing them all day long, but heavier acetate will tend to slip down your face if you break a sweat in the sun.

DON'T: wear comedy fancy dress

Before you pack anything themed, take a step back. You're a grown man now; leave the fancy dress for the school leavers. Plus think how much you'll sweat in that full-length Scooby Doo costume you've been eyeing.

DO: go seriously Seventies

The disco decade is right on trend right now, so if you've been tempted to try out flared trousers, silk shirts or short-shorts, now's the time to set your inner David Bowie or Jimi Hendrix free. It's also the perfect excuse to grow out your moustache and sideburns while your out of the office - just be sure to pack a small tin of moustache wax to keep them under control.

DON'T: wear board shorts or a mankini

We know you want to cool off by getting your legs out, but neither of these items are the right course of action: board shorts will result in an awkward tan line midway down your calf (and make anyone who's not a ripped basketball player look approximately 2 feet shorter than they really are) and a mankini - well, do we really need to go into that?

DO: wear a pair of smart swim shorts

Made from quick-drying, breathable material, swim shorts will not only keep you cool all day long, but a pair that hits mid-thigh will also be very flattering on all body types shapes. As opposed to board shorts that cut off at the knee (which only serve to emphasise the thinner part of your legs from there down), a shorter length cuts across your thigh at its most muscular section making them look as impressive as possible.

DON'T: wear a bad hat

Trilbys, cowboys, the branded straw hats Carlsberg are handing out at the site entrance: none of these are acceptable.

DO: wear a baseball hat

There's a landslide of smart, minimal baseball caps on the market right now - so you can stay brand loyal and keep your head protected at the same time.

DON'T: get naked

Perhaps acceptable at Burning Man (at a push), but - trust us - no-one wants to see your junk at Reading.

DO: go shirtless the right way

While getting all your kit off isn't something we would encourage, we can understand how a man who's baking hot might want to cool off by removing his top layer. However, we'd advise that instead of going to full hog and taking your top fully off, keep a suitably summery, shirt-sleeve shirt on but unbutton it. This will not only look superb in photos, but will also mean your shoulders don't get fried when you forget to apply sun lotion - which, let's face it, you will - and you'll protect any other festival-goers from your unprotected armpits too.

DON'T: wear flip-flops

Flip-flops are great for the beach, but, as they don't have any form of support or shaping in the sole, your feet and calves will be killing you by the end of the day. Plus, you could quite easily kick 'em off and never be able to find them in the crowds.

DO: wear sandals

Instead, go for a pair of sandals like the Birkentock Arizona EVA. Not only is the formed foam of the shoe itself perfectly moulded to cradle and support your foot, but it's also super lightweight and totally washable should you get them covered in dirt.

DON'T: wear a backpack

We get it, you want to keep your valuables on you, but don't want to pack out your pockets - but no-one wants to get an upper-cut from the bag on your back as you jump up when the beat drops.

DO: wear a bumbag

Keep your phone, card and other all-day accoutrements in something a little more portable like a bum bag. And before you start to get Eighties flashbacks, you don't have to wear it around your waist: clip it diagonally across your body for maximum accessibility (and security).